“I first encountered Derek Ailes through short story and got a feel for his wild sense of humor. When he decided to parody the comic book universes with The Undead Pool, I wasn’t sure he could pull it off. Since then, Derek Ailes is moving quickly to establish himself as the leader in zombie and horror parody.” — Jay Wilburn #CaptainThreeKidneys
Excerpt from The Undead Pool: Dawn of Injustice by Derek Ailes
Thomas Berenger, Bliss Paine, Rambo and Brut walked down the main street heading toward the Walmart Ta-khara had taken control of. They could hear screams in the distance. To the left of them was the parking lot to the city’s zoo.
“I think the screams are coming from the zoo,” Bliss Paine said.
Thomas adjusted his red night vision goggles and magnified the images from the entrance of the zoo. He could see several zombies attacking some of the nighttime visitors.
“Zombies are attacking people,” he reported.
“Zombies, at the zoo?” Bliss Paine asked.
“Zombies, I’m out,” Rambo said.
“You need Brut,” Brut stated.
“You want to help them? Brut, are you crazy?” Rambo argued.
“Guys, that’s not our mission,” Bliss Paine pointed out.
“I don’t care if it’s our mission or not,” Thomas said. “I’m saving as many of them as I can.”
“What about the explosives in our head?” Bliss Paine argued.
“Zombies around the area where Ta-khara is. That can’t be a coincidence. Come on. People are being slaughtered.” He ran toward the zoo and fired at the zombies.
“If his head explodes, maybe all the zombies will be killed in the process,” Rambo joked.
Brut forcefully pushed Rambo forward.
“Fine! Let’s go hunt some zombies!” Rambo shouted and ran toward the zoo.
Brut stared at Bliss Paine.
“Fine!” she shouted and ran toward the zoo followed by Brut.
Thomas ran into the zoo blasting each zombie he encountered with his modified laser rifles. The zombies’ heads exploded like watermelons. Bliss Paine swung her mallet, knocking several zombies to the ground. She swung downward smashing their heads, causing her clothing to be soaked in their blood. Rambo fired a missile from his rocket; the blast took out several more zombies. Brut grabbed a zombie with his tree-like arms and ripped it in half.
The four continued the assault as more zombies entered the zoo. Thomas climbed the hill by the front gate and positioned his sniper rifle toward the approaching zombies. With perfect aim and speed, he blew the heads off several zombies.
They heard a loud roar from an angry beast.
“That can’t be good,” Rambo said.
The ground shook as a zombiefied elephant plowed through the zombie horde.
“Run!” Bliss Paine shouted.
Thomas held the sniper rifle steady as he aimed it toward one of the elephant’s eyes. He fired. The eye exploded causing the elephant to roar. It charged forward intent on killing its attacker.
“Brut, I need some height,” Rambo said as he jumped onto Brut’s shoulders. He aimed his rocket toward the elephant. “Thomas, take out his other eye.”
As the elephant roared again after its other eye was obliterated, Rambo fired a rocket straight into its mouth. A few seconds later, its head exploded.
“Cool,” Rambo said as they were showered in the elephant’s blood and guts.
“I hope that was the only zombie animal,” Bliss Paine said.
“You need Brut,” Brut said as he pointed toward two lions heading toward them.
Thomas fired two rounds killing both lions.
“We could be at this all day,” Rambo stated.
“I think it’s time to stop the zombies at the source,” Thomas suggested.
“To Walmart!” Rambo shouted.